Sunday, February 3, 2008

tribal illness

I am waking up after a week of being so sick I could do nothing but sleep. I was surprised I was sick at all; I usually don't catch colds or the flu.

Northern Arizona University has been inundated with the flu.

I've been reading Carolyn Myss' book, Anatomy of the Spirit, and she links the 1st Chakra with our "Tribe" and with survival. The 1st chakra affects our legs, bones, lower spine and immune systems. If we have significant stress, those parts of our physical bodies may be affected. In the tribal case, we may experience epidemics.

There was a recent budget cut announcement at NAU (effecting my "work tribe" and money, which brings up issues of survival) right before the "flu epidemic" hit NAU. (Constant news about the Northern Arizona's economy has not been good, and as we are aware, the U.S. economy is looking bleak) Could it be that I, and many of my co-workers, plugged into this bad news and became sick?

I'm usually pretty positive, but on my 4th day of being ill, I started thinking, "I'm now on leave without pay, I might not be able to pay my bills next month, I can't lean on my family for help (the "super" tribe), I've never been able to lean on my family, my sister is sucking the life out of my mother and my mother lets her do it, my family sucks the life out of me and I don't even live near them, I'm not letting them take my energy anymore (the family stuff really started spinning out-hmmm-more to look at there), my friends are great but . . . " All of those thoughts are connected to survival.

That was a terrible spiral. It took me a day to shake off those blues. And, of course, as soon as I started letting go of those feelings I started feeling better. Curious to see how this unfolds.

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